Tom Valcanis is made of metal, his circuits gleam. Freelance journalist and writer residing in Melbourne. Besides being a hirsute part-time robot only faintly visible after dinner time, he is a writer and former US correspondent for MetalAsFuck.net, contributor to Onya Magazine, Australian Hysteria, The Big Issue and the AU Review among others. Kerry King shouted him a beer once and that's been his go-to story ever since. Whaddya know, there it is again. His website's at http://www.crushtor.net.