Buy Your Own Fake Internet Girlfriend

Look, sometimes it’s hard when you’re feeling the pressure to have a girlfriend. It might be your friends. It might be your mum.

But let’s face it, some people are just too um, busy, to have a relationship.

It’s nothing to do with your devotion to World of Warcraft, or v-neck t-shirts, or your hatred of people in general.

At girlfriendhire.com, they understand. And they’re here to help.

For the right price, you can make everyone on Facebook think you’re taken, or indeed that there is a whole line of ladies to your door, without having any contact with an actual female in the outside world.

In fact, five bucks (bargain!) will buy you those three little words – “in a relationship” – with a foreign girlfriend, who probably has a real life boyfriend of her own and is just doing it to get through college.

The same price will get you all manner of other delights – from personalised videos (for proof when your friends say “pics or GTFO”) to Facebook comments, even ones “demanding to know why your relationship status still says single” because “nothing makes you more desirable than having someone who’s obsessed with you” – to make your mates, or your ex, or perhaps a potential love interest, jealous.

Hell, why not up the drama by staging a break-up too? And all for the price of a Big Mac.

 It doesn’t stop with Facebook; fakegirlfriend.co allows you to create a phone number for your pretend lover, text her, and in return receive your own carefully pre-made witty, sexy, “personalised girlfriend-esque” responses.

This is legit, guys. The creator of fakegirlfriend, Ricky Robinett, 28, told Salon he created the site after asking himself, “what’s the stupidest thing I can build?”

Have fun, take care and just don’t get in too deep and do a Manti Te’o.

What we want to know is…where can we buy a boyfriend? There’s a gap in the market right there…

profile of Eliza Goetze