10 Things: Blurred Lines banned at a second UK uni


--

Blurred lines banned at a second uni 

Given the rapeyness of Robin Thicke’s Blurred Lines it should come as no surprise that not one, but two universities in the UK have banned the song from their campus’, with the University of Leeds following the… lead… of the University of Edinburgh. “The decision to ban Blurred Lines from our venues has been taken as it promotes an unhealthy attitude towards sex and consent,” well put sistah—Kirsty Haigh, VP of EU’s student union. The universities have banned the song from being played in any of the venues operated by their student unions. And whilst young minds have challenged censorship throughout history, I can’t see too many objections to the banning of a song that features lines line, ‘I’ll give you something big enough to tear your ass in two.’

 

Swedish court: okay to bust nut on beach if not aiming at anyone in particular

THIS JUST NOW: A Swedish court has ruled in favour of a 65-year-old man who was done for knocking one out on a beach in Stockholm, stating that the man was not “pleasuring himself towards a specific person.” What’s even better is the prosecution saw the logic in this and backed down. “For this to be a criminal offence it's required that the sexual molestation was directed towards one or more people. I think the court's judgement is reasonable,” Olof Vrethammar, court prosecutor said. God—I love Europe! ‘Scuse me whilst I go bat by the edge of the Yarra.

 

Greek youth unemployment: 59%

Still cut that you didn’t get that Myer Christmas-casual position last season? Spare a thought for your Greek counterparts—they’re enduring a whopping 59% unemployment rate right now. A restless youth is a dangerous thing—that’s how wars get started (not that Greece poses any threat to anyone… other than itself). As a comparison, if you’re 15-24-years-old in Australia, you’re enjoying 11% unemployment.

 

$800M on first day: Grand Theft Auto shows Hollywood how it’s done

Rockstar’s long awaited Grand Theft Auto V launched on Tuesday and they’re very happy to boast that the game took a staggering $800 million dollars (that’s $800,000,000 if you were unsure) on its first day. And at $109 RRP in Australia—it’s no wonder! Consider also that GTAV isn’t even a next generation game (yet), with Rockstar confident enough to launch the game in the twilight weeks of current generation consoles. The game cost a mere $115M to develop and an impressive $150M to market leaving a rather tidy gross profit.

 

Pope: we’re spending too much time focusing on gays and abortion

(… They’re going to hell anyway). Pope Francis, unmasked defender of the cloth, opined that the Roman Catholic Church was “obsessed” with stereotypically well-dressed men who have loads of disposable income, slayers of unborn humans and heathens trying to avoid contracting AIDS by the sinful catchment of the seed of man in a rubber sheath, shaped like Satan. “It is not necessary to talk about these issues all the time,” he said, which I’m interpreting as, “STFU and love one another.” And this, which I find quite amazing—“We have to find a new balance, otherwise even the moral edifice of the church is likely to fall like a house of cards, losing the freshness and fragrance of the Gospel.” So it seems La Papa is steering his flock in a more moderate direction—one that I hope, for its own sake, helps the church get over itself some day. This is the word of the Lord!

 

Did you see Assad in his Fox News interview?

Oh, Fox News spoke with Syrian leader Bashar al-Assad on Tuesday in a rather exclusive interview with the iron-fisted leader. Right from the get-go Dennis Kucinich, a Fox News contributor and former congressman, hit Assad up on whether or not he has a chemical weapons stockpile. In a typical politician’s manner, Assad said he did without directly saying so, “it’s not a secret anymore.” That was all I needed to see. Despite owning up to having the goods, Assad went on to deny responsibility for last month’s chemical weapons attack, deferring blame to the rebels—and Russia’s got his back on that point. The interesting thing is that Assad, speaking clearly and eloquently, was ultra-composed and amazingly at ease throughout the no-questions-barred interview—not the tyrannical, iron-fisted stereotype you’d expect. Meanwhile, his people are being slammed by his army.

 

A taste of freedom: “technical glitch” frees social media in Iran

Iranians got a taste of freedom on Monday when a “technical glitch” allowed them to log into Facebook and Twitter without the need to circumvent the government imposed internet filter. Among other sites, the social networks were blocked in Iran in 2009 to prevent Iranian minds from wandering. Citizens took to the net with exclamations of joy, some even thanking the state’s new and relatively moderate president Hassan Rowhani, “Twitter and Facebook has been freed! Rowhani thank you!” But the fun ended when the glitch was detected on Tuesday, with one of the state’s watchdogs issuing this chilling statement, “If there had been any negligence, it will be punished.”

 

Poll: Are you happy with Tony Abbott?

Apparently the Nine Network censored itself when someone objected to poll results that cast the new Prime Minister in a bad light. This image is all that can be found of the poll, even though it’s currently still indexed on Google.

 

Farewell Yamauchi-san: father of Nintendo as we know it dies

It was a sad day for the games world yesterday after ex-Nintendo president, Hiroshi Yamauchi passed away. Yamauchi-san is credited with transforming Nintendo into an electronic gaming giant when he realised the potential of new-fangled electronics. He became president of Nintendo in 1949, straight out of uni, after his grandfather died of a stroke. Until that time, Nintendo was just a small playing card company. Studying his pic, this gangsta clearly inspired Christopher Walken.


Humans must move to Mars once Earth becomes to hot

Fortunately, we’ve got 1.75 billion years before we need to consult the historical document the Total Recall will no doubt become. ALL HAIL DOUGLAS QUAID! Scientists estimate that the earth will move out of the Solar System’s “habitable zone” somewhere between 1.75 to 3.25 billion years from now, causing the oceans to evaporate and all living things (except microbes) to perish.

profile of Chuck Kolyvas

Next article

Warwick Capper invites you to a sleep over

By BRISBANETIMES on