JoannaLowry
Thursday 12 Jan 2012 - 6:00 AM

Top ten wedding dresses for Britney Spears

Would you like a side of french fries with your wedding?

Last month Britney Spears announced her plans to tie the knot to Jason Trawick, her former agent, in a sporadically capitalised, exclamation mark-heavy tweet. “OMG,” the pop star wrote. “Last night Jason surprised me with the one gift I’ve been waiting for. Can’t wait to show you! SO SO SO excited!!!” Social media cynics’ confirmation came a few days later when Spears flashed an engagement rock at Trawick’s 40th birthday bash. By then there was mounting speculation as to what the bride-to-be would wear on the big day; Spears may not be the most stylish celebrity on the planet, but her sartorial choices (double denim, red PVC and midriff tops) are, at the very least, memorable.

Of course, this won’t be Spears’ only wedding to date. The first cab off the rank — which can best be summed up as “shotgun nuptials in Las Vegas” — saw Spears walk down the aisle in ripped jeans and a trucker cap; she was wife to childhood friend Jason Alexander for all of 55 hours. Spears made a second attempt at matrimonial bliss in 2004. She wore a strapless gown by Monique L'Huillier and a tiara, but it was an occasion marked by the groom — perennially undershirt-clad dancer Kevin Federline — giving attendants white tracksuits with the word "Pimp" written on the back, and revellers chowing down chicken wings. The newlyweds shared home videos of their courtship on a reality show, Britney & Kevin: Chaotic, and, for a while, things seemed ok. But, eventually, the relationship turned sour. Enter: Britney’s head shaving / crotch shot phase, and K-Fed getting fat enough to be a contestant on weight-loss series Excess Baggage.

So, what can we expect for wedding instalment number three? We might very well see more chicken wings; according to a source with Perez, Spears wants “a traditional Southern-style wedding with comfort food, surrounded by her family, her two sons and all of her childhood friends.” As for the frock, the Belfast Telegraph is reporting that Spears is “thinking about asking one of her favourite designers, someone like Betsey Johnson or her friend Jeremy Scott. If it’s Jeremy, it’ll be more futuristic. If she picks Betsey, it’ll still be edgy but more traditional, with a lot of layering.”

We’re sold on a deep-fried menu, and we love the idea of Britney saying "I do" in a loud, unorthodox designer number. Here are our dress suggestions:

1. Something from Jeremy Scott’s A/W 2006 collection, Fast Food, would be perfect. Scott and Spears have worked together successfully in the past (Scott designed the futuristic airline stewardess costume for Spears’ ‘Toxic’ video), and, as well as chicken wings holding a special place in Spears’ slowly-clogging-up heart, she’s a well-known Cheetos and Red Bull aficionado. We’re thinking this french-fries inspired dress could work, with the hat customised to include a veil. And for the groom, this strictly MA15+ cowboy get-up — it ties in nicely with the Southern theme.

2. Ashish have also experimented with fast food-inspired fashion. A capsule collection created exclusively for Topshop features t-shirts and sweatshirts with donut and bacon-and-egg prints. One sized extra large, worn as a dress, and paired with meat-inspired heels by Japanese designer Tokio Kumagai (who, by the way, did the whole ‘meat’ thing way before Lady Gaga slaughtered it — pun intended), and off to the altar Spears goes.

3. Betsey Johnson is another rumoured dress designer. This ensemble from her Spring 2011 collection would be more than apt for the occasion. Note the choker, and the words ‘Ride Me’ ever so classily rendered in diamantes. A hint of what's to come in the matrimonial bed?

4. Another Betsey Johnson dress we like: this puffy, pirate-inspired one from Spring 2009, which comes complete with a veil. It wouldn’t be a dramatic change for Spears; she’s been photographed out-and-about wearing something similar..

5. In honour of the skin-tight red PVC jumpsuit she wore in the ‘Opps I did it again’ video, it might be fitting for Spears to wear some sort of bondage-inspired outfit. Something by Thierry Mugler or Gareth Pugh could fit the bill, or she could try borrowing this showstopper of a dress off Daisy Lowe.

6. Who could forget Britney's ‘Like A Virgin’ moment? At the 2003 MTV Awards, she performed the song atop a giant plastic wedding cake, before locking lips with Madonna. The white lace dress she wore could always be revisited if purse strings are particularly tight.

7. One of Spears’ biggest fashion faux pas’ was when she and then-boyfriend Justin Timberlake showed up at the 2001 American Music Awards in matching double denim. For her wedding, why not channel her love of denim into something tasteful AND on-trend — mid-blue, minimalistic, and with a boxy silhouette, aka this Stella McCartney tunic dress?

8. We can definitely see Britney working some sort of Dolce and Gabbana look. Promotional images for Spears' new album, Femme Fatale, see her wearing a selection from the Italian brand, and the designers reportedly love dancing to Britney's songs. This flower embroidered D&G number is suitably garish.

9. Spears wore a sparkly harem outfit, complete with a real-life snake, to the 2003 MTV Awards. Something similar was shown at Emilio Pucci’s gypsy-inspired Spring 2012 show, and if Spears decides to ditch the south-western theme in place of something more exotic, she should think about wearing this.

10. To the 2002 MTV Awards, Spears wore a leather halter mini-dress with thigh-high lace-up heels and crocheted arm warmers — an outfit eerily similar to this one from Alexander McQueen’s A/W 2011 collection. If McQueen is good enough for the future Queen of England, it’s good enough for the Princess of Pop.