Stop crying it's ruining your make up

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Being young is hard. So hard for some, that instead of just getting weepy during highly emotional times (like when you forget to thoroughly wash your hands after using deep heat and then go to the toilet), you get emotional all the time and want to show the world that you belong in this socio-group. Here's the emo 101:

- Hot Topic is your best friend (after emospace of course), you can find really really esoteric shit on this website, it's like fashion and jewelry designers lost in wonderland using only black, red and purple palettes. If you don't have a credit card because you're not allowed near sharp objects then locally Dangerfield is probably your next best bet, although the range wont be as gigatron you will still find some emotastic pieces.

- Using too much hair product is never enough, always follow the signs of the compass, either south for the fringe, north for the mohawk rocker look or east or west for that stylish emo in you. If your fringe won't go down, try using a bandana or other rag-type kerchief to flatten it into place.

- Make up is perfectly acceptable for men, not only to hide those very long nights you have whinging about how shit your parents are, but to prove to other chicks/dudes that you are perfectly confused with your sexuality and emotions.

- Boys wearing girls clothing is OK (for you), you probably don't need your testicles anyways, and the rest of society doesn't want your wailing offspring so wearing girls jeans is A-OK. Don't forget to couple it with the tightest fitting shirt you can find to replicate having a healthy body, although you bumped enough K to put a unicorn on A.D.H.D to sleep it might be slightly believable that you have muscles the tighter your tee is.

- Write poetry on yourself, nothing reeks of frustration harder than publicly displaying it on your body. You can also include band names to try and gather like minded shit bands that emo kids like to you. While your at it, don't forget to also draw healed scab wounds from where you sliced yourself (the writer however does not condone your commitment to suicide).

Once you have all these things in check you're ready for the world, in Sydney a good hot spot to meet your fellow emo hello kitty friends is behind Town Hall Steps. Although the Town Hall Steps itself has been an institutional meeting spot for youth, emo's have to of course be different and hang in the slums where the bums used to reside. Don't forget to be really obnoxious, scream at passers-by and throw bottles everywhere ... however there is an age restriction for this venue, generally under the age of 18 will suffice.