Top Ten Intense Old People Dramas
10. Last Orders
Our story begins with Michael Caine dying of old age and WTF? Who wants to see that? Caine’s going to live forever, right? Right? Why are you all looking at me like that?
Next you’ll be trying to tell me Sean Connery and Gene Hackman are never going to make another movie. Or Bridget Fonda! Where’d she go? Geez, who goes to the movies to be reminded about the passage of time and the inevitability of death? Prequels, that’s what we want. Movies where all the characters are younger and the dead ones are alive again.
At the other end of the Old People vs Death spectrum is Red, which is basically a gun show video catalogue shoot, only instead of bikini girls, the agency accidentally sent over a bunch of stair chair models and the gun dudes were so scared of second amendment reforms, they went ahead anyway. Which is why there’s a sequel due later this year.
As they say, it’s better to give than receive, especially when you’re an old person and the gift is death.