I think it is time we called out the most bullshit phrase in movie marketing. It's an insidious little number that insults our intelligence and makes a mockery of the movie business. It's pretentious and it's cheap. It's putting a mule in a horse harness. It's a real estate agent laying astroturf in front of a fixer upper. It's like adding whipped cream and glacé cherries to a week-old cake at the bakery in the hopes that it will sell.
It is the phrase: "To celebrate the DVD release of…"
"To celebrate the DVD release of…" is typically heard in conjunction with a marketing event, stunt, or competition aimed at boosting DVD (or Blu-ray) sales. It's the go-to script plastered over commercials, websites and radio that can preface anything from a t-shirt giveaway to a spectacular media stunt (I once heard of an office that enjoyed an influx of busty old-west barmaids serving whisky for the DVD release of True Grit. At 10 in the morning). "To celebrate the DVD release of…" suggests that the company releasing the product is just SO DARN EXCITED to be bringing this product to us that we should all gather together in jubilation. Frankly, I find it a little overblown.
Marketing may be a necessary evil- nothing wrong with trying to drum up a few sales- but I take umbrage at the word "celebrate". I celebrate many things; births, marriages, anniversaries, and achievements, but to use the word "celebrate" is association with DVD sales somewhat diminishes its power. Plus it's vaguely insulting. Our lives are not so empty and joyless that the release of Avatar be heralded by a great feast and merry minstrels. Those who market us DVDs insist on the patronising suggestion that whenever a new one comes out it's time to party. I call bullshit.
The DVD release is the precise moment that the film moves from the sphere of the magical and special to the realm of the ordinary and everyday. They are purchased and lined up neatly on bookshelves to be at-hand on rainy days. Today the gap between cinema screening and DVD release is so short we can barely build anticipation. In truth, watching a DVD is pretty much the antithesis of celebration. It's what you do when you were too lazy to make it out of the house to the cinema in the first place. It's an activity which necessitates no social collaboration, no emotional expression, no special effort. You needed don your Sunday best. You needn't even wear pants. While the release of a movie can be thoroughly exciting (Midnight fancy dress screenings of Harry Potter around the world attest to this) no such fanfare is ever awarded to a DVD release by the public, so why do marketers suggest any level of hoopla at all?
Of course, this kind of a lie is intrinsic to our culture. We, the consumers, are living in a world of constant exaggeration. We type "LOL" and "ROFL" when we should really be typing "HATS" (Humphs Air Through Nose). It's easy enough to be swept up in hyperbole but maybe we should take a step back. Instead of suggesting we "celebrate" a DVD release perhaps marketers might prompt us to "acknowledge" it. Perhaps we should "greet" the release; "defer" to it casually. If you're in marketing you may not think words like these stir enough emotion to loosen money from wallets but I'm not sure "celebrate" is really doing to trick either.
I acknowledge that a lot of hard work goes into producing a DVD. Behind every release there are literally HOURS of acquisition agreements, menu design, burning, and shrink wrapping. I don't wish to disparage the efforts of the everyday heroes who deliver us our West Wing box sets, or the brave individuals who tirelessly stack and re-stack them on the shelves at JB Hi Fi. These quiet achievers stand as pillars in our consumer society but honestly, I don't think the word "celebrate" has much of a place in their operations. Like the wooly mammoth that gave Fred Flintstone a shower each morning, some jobs just have to be done with a shrug of the shoulders and a wry "it's a living".
Dear marketers, we are people of substance. We lead full and interesting lives. Everyday tiny miracles run fleeting before us. The wonders of our world and the beauty of life give us so much to truly celebrate, so perhaps we'll save the celebration for the truly remarkable things in life. Now if you'll excuse me, my toast just popped and I'm going to throw a ticker tape parade.