Men in underpantsDear The Internet,
You've show me many things over the course of our relationship. Most recently, it's been the strange and inscrutable look on Bjork's face as Robyn covers 'Hyperballad' right in front of her. Yes, The Internet, we've had some good times, you and I.
But when all I want is an abridged collection of men in their underwear from my favourite pop culture moments, you fail me.
Maybe it's my problem. I have a pretty specific idea of what should come up when I google 'men in underpants', and you know what, The Internet? Ripped bods and insouciant stares are only a small part of it.
I mean, this is good and all, but there is so much more to the search term 'men in underpants' that I just don't think you're getting. Allow me take you through the many more options you could be delivering to us, your loyal
But first can I please point out how ridiculous it feels to show you how to do your job? It's demeaning to us both. Anyway, let's begin the tutorial.
Firstly, when I think 'men in underpants' I think of Keanu Reeves in Parenthood.
In what is basically the best role of his career, Keanu's pairing of 'underpant' with a classic dopey Keanu grin raised him to heights he has never since surpassed.
Incidentally, Keanu turns 46 tomorrow and I'd just like to wish him a very happy birthday! Happy Birthday, Keanu Charles Reeves!
This is Steve McQueen. Although they're not really undies he's wearing, this picture came up on about the 50th page of your suggestions when I googled 'men in underpants', and I like it. I really like it. Would it kill you to bring it a little further to the top?
Obviously, this picture should have been the very first thing that jumped out at me when I enlisted your help with my search, The Internet. If you need a caption for it, may I suggest labelling it as A Phenomenally Good Poster of Prince Taking a Shower in his Undies.
'Men in underpants' also makes me think of that scene from The Rules of Attraction where the boys are jumping on the bed to George Michael's 'Faith'—the very one that you, The Internet, won't let me embed.
As punishment, please accept instead this scene from the Jennifer Garner film Suddenly 30, where her boyfriend strips for her. It's actually very good! I suppose you sometimes come through with the gold after all.
Hmm. 'Man in underpants.' I know it might make some people think of Rhys Ifans in Notting Hill, but ever since my friend Michelle showed me this picture, now all I can think of is that time Robert Pattinson woke up on Christmas morning to discover he was an amputee.
Kevin Kline jogging in the shortest shorts ever in The Big Chill is another 'man in short shorts' moments that can, for our purposes, be adapted for our actually totally sleazy 'man in underpants' theme which I assure you was quite innocent when we began, but which quickly deteriorated the moment my friend Ronnie explained the importance of this scene to me: 'You can actually distinguish the movement of the penis from the testicles as he's jogging'. Another thing to add to the list of reasons to love Kevin Kline, perhaps.
And finally, my friend Nat reminded me of this memorable 'underpant' moment from So I Married an Axe Murderer, for which you, the Internet, offer a soundbite and nothing more. Well, the soundbite is magnificent, anyway.
And this, if you're interested, is where this idiotic concept began—in the front row of the Malthouse Theatre last week as my friend Anna and I really watched Ewen Leslie and cast perform approximately half of Franz Kafka's The Trial in their undies.
The play is also coming to Sydney and Perth if anyone is curious to know what it's like to experience that sort of thing.
In any case, let's finish off with another classic ripped bod and insouciant stare, just to round things out.
I hope you've learned something from today, The Internet, and that from now on you'll make it easier for us to find A Phenomenally Good Poster of Prince Taking a Shower in his Undies, or whatever else it might be we're looking for.
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