Hello all of you and welcome to another autumn. Beautiful, isn't it? All those copper golds and burnt oranges and auburn browns should make it the very season that that most minority of hair colours, red, flourishes in. But apparently not.
On Monday, the
already notorious M.I.A. video clip for '
Born Free' was released and it was almost immediately banned from YouTube. (You can still watch it on M.I.A.'s website, but it comes with a warning of graphic violence and some nudity.) In it, redhaired males are presented as an ethnic minority and rounded up and killed. It's either a brilliant political comment or a canny marketing ploy.
But I don't want to talk about M.I.A. I want to talk about Gingers. Carrots. Rangas. Fantapantses. Every few months without fail, The Media will get a little bit hysterical about redheads and those of carrot or claret colour will suddenly become either gorgeous in the eyes of the world again, or persecuted. The 'news' stories are wide and varying, but the issue of hair colour is always at the forefront.
We've heard that redheads will
die out in 100 years. Ads that have suggested redheads are ugly have been
banned. Other ads, such as the
VicRoads one called '
Gingas Get Fresh'
were just dumb. And who can forget a year or so ago when the Adelaide Zoo
pulled an advertising campaign that offered free admission to 'rangas' because of 'negative reaction'.
More seriously, in the UK ginger bullying has led to
suicide.
Disclosure: I'm a fake redhead, and my experience of prejudice is hardly of consequence in light of that M.I.A. clip or the awful bullying stories.
But—I do want to say that I do have a little flame-haired conspiracy theory of my own. As an artificial redhead I can't help but notice how the choice of red hair dye at chemists and grocery stores has been dwindling over the past few years.
When I first started dying my hair red in the mid-nineties, it was the era of Fudge. Everyone dyed their hair with Fudge, and there were tons of reds to choose from.
Cherry Bomb was a particular favourite for both men and women. Dudes had fiery images such as this to look up to:
And coppery-hued idols such as these used to make
me some people with totally horrific taste in music swoon:
Fake redheads used to be able to choose from such multifarious shades of hair dye as Scarlet and Crimson and Damask and Carmine and Oxblood and Ruby and Vermilion, but now, as far as I can tell, all we have is one solitary shade of dye called
Hypnotic Red. That's IT. I've checked in three different Australian states and this is my conclusion. Is it an insidious government plot to phase out even the
fake ones among us? Please add it to the moon landing and the 9/11 conspiracy and we'll move on.
Ginger hate isn't new, of course. In medieval times, Satan could always be spotted because of his red hair. In Greek mythology, red hair was synonymous with vampirism. Other famous historical redheads are Judas Iscariot, Emperor Nero, Caligula and Napoleon Bonaparte. Their behaviour has hardly given redheads the best wrap, but surely we have moved beyond this. In this modern day, don't you find it weird that a mere hair colour can inspire such simultaneous scorn and adoration?
Because, of course, as we know, redheads are also
adored. Worshipped. From the pre-Raphaelites to Christina Hendricks from
Mad Men. From Lucille Ball to Rick Astley to Regina Spektor. And Lily Cole and Karen Elson do pretty well for themselves on the modelling circuit, too. With too many to name, redhaired celebrities are everywhere, and if you ever need a fix, the many online
galleries will be happy to oblige. Gingers, in the end, are as fetishised as they are tyrannised.
In recent times, comedians such as
Catherine Tate and
Tim Minchin have been fighting back against the prejudice in their own ways. And there is
Redheadday in the Netherlands that celebrates the naturally fiery-flamed of hair.
So today, as an antidote to the ginger hate spreading across the world, please spare a thought for the 2 per cent of the population who are natural redheads. And consider using the word 'Titian' to describe redheads from here on in, instead of 'Ranga' or 'Ginga'. It might not seem like much, but it'll mean more to a redhead than you will ever know.
And if you need any more convincing,
you should listen to this guy. (Via the brilliant Jess McGuire at
Defamer.)