Mr Techno1ogy schools you on why Microsoft is Cool

It seems that many people on the Vine for some silly reason think that my main man Bill Gates is not cool but the Devil himself, Apple CEO Steve Jobs is.  Not true, my ill informed friends!  Bill is actually the granddaddy of this shit we know as cool and I shall show you why…

#1: PC – Personal Computer or Popular Culture??

Example 1

You know the Windows XP Shut Down Song?  Bill Gates first officially whistled that tune in 1978 whilst on a picnic with his mother (citation needed) – a year later, Gary Newman released the best song ever, “Cars”.  Have a listen to the two and you be the judge.  Gary Newman – he’s cool, all because he did a cover version of a whistle and changed the words to be about driving his car. 

“Windows XP Shutdown Song” – Based upon the Whistlings of Bill Gates (1978)

“Cars” – Gary Newman (1979)

Examle 2

In 1983, Michael Jackson was uber cool right before he slipped and fell onto a surgeon’s knife and contracted a severe case of Pedofilitis.  See him here singing Wanna Be Starting Something.  Wow.  How friggen cool.  Wait – what are the backup singers chanting at 4:41??  Oh that’s right – “MA-MA SEY MA-MA SA MA-MA MICROSOFT”. 

#2: PC – Personal Computer or Political Correctness??

We all know that people who use PC’s do so because they are smart and considerate to others.  The mere act of “turning on your PC” is not just the simple process of turning on ones (kickarse) computer, but moreover a subliminal metaphore to be more Politically Correct. Thus, by default, all Mac users are racist bigots.  Racism isn’t cool, as can be seen in the graph I’ve just whipped up below... 

#3: PC – Personal Computer or Pocket ¢hange??

A game from The Price is Right, hosted here by Drew Carey.  Never seen it, but it looks fucken cool.  

#4: PC – Personal Computer or Phil Collins??

And finally, Against All Odds, we have everybodies favourite drummer who can’t resist pushing up his jacket sleeves - Phil Collins...

Oh wait, Phil Collins isn’t cool, what am I doing??  MUM, HAVE YOU BEEN FUCKING WITH MY FILES AGAIN??  I swear I’m gonna let her tyres down so she can’t get out of her bedroom…

• Currently 0/5 Stars.
• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

MrTechno1ogy

TechBLOGogy 1.0

Mr Techno1ogy iz hacking as we speak. well, when i say "we speak", I really mean "I type, you read". But I've probably finished typing by the time you read this and on to the next mainframe hack in.